There and Back Again

See what I did there?

Okay! Still getting back into the groove of this email thing.

Actually, I'm getting back into the groove of everything.  And it hasn't been easy. I am in Zagreb still.

Until tomorrow. I am shipping back off to Beograd!!!! How about that? It's about time!

This week...where to start? Well, It was great seeing you on Christmas family!!! What a trip, being back on the other end of the screen!  And Christmas at the Rowe's was great! We feasted well with the Rowe's and the Hansen's, and the AP's and Elder Stuart, and continued our wild transfer.  We sang and contacted in center and found some awesome people once more! I am convinced that may be the only full proof method of finding!

I don't think I mentioned a lot on the Skype call about the 2 new investigators we found, so let me share so now real quick. One's name is Luka. He works at this restaurant in center called Rocket Burger. I guess some Croats from Canada set it up, and all the employees speak English well. We went there to eat one night (it was so good. American burgers with a good amount of pulled pork and bacon bits on it) and Luka was on break so he was sitting at the bar drinking a beer. We sat on either side of him, go ahead and picture that scene, and we just talked a bit about nothing. He is familiar with us because missionaries eat there often. Next thing I know, we are talking about the Gospel with him. He told us that he was somewhere in the middle of Catholicism and Atheism, and was very confused. He said his heart tells him to believe in God and miracles he has seen and what he has been raised learning, but logic that he has learned has put holes in his understanding of God and he just doesn't know. We shared with him the first lesson in essence, including the elements of the Great Apostasy and the Restoration. We switched into Croatian when sharing the experience Joseph had in the Sacred Grove, and he got a little emotional and was moved by the Spirit. He asked if he could borrow a Book of Mormon to read, and we obviously surprised him by giving him one of his own to keep. He was so excited. We have talked with him once more, and his words were, "this book feels as though it is a missing piece from the Bible." Elder Bennett and Stuart will meet with him again this week, and I am so excited for him. And all we did was follow our stomachs and the Spirit!

Speaking of Elder Stuart, his name is Elder Jordan Stuart, from Logan, Utah. Any bells ringing? He's a stud.

Back to investigator number 2. His name is Amadu, and yep you guessed it, he is from somewhere in West Africa, near Ghana, and speaks some English, and is fluent in his African language and French. So we winged it in English and French with him (and no surprise, I didn't do the French). He has a French Book of Mormon and is very interested in learning more. We will either meet with him tonight or these chums I am leaving behind will get him tomorrow.  He is awesome.

After Christmas, things took a turn for the worst.  I got a call that I would need to plan on staying in Zagreb past the designated Saturday, through Monday and possibly longer. The Elder who I am filling in for was still working through his new medication and it wasn't getting a lot better. He has only 3 months left, so he's a trooper for keeping on. I guess it wasn't the worst news, I actually have grown fond of Zagreb. It's way cool here, having the Rowe's around and the branch is very strong. I love the members that I have already met! And I have learned to love my companion more than I did on day one. Our differences are stark, but after making adjustments on my part, and finding good in his heart, I actually have enjoyed my time with him.  But the days were long and a struggle. Lessons fell through, plans didn't work out, and we found ourselves walking around town all day, every day, just looking for people who would listen. And, as one can imagine, nobody wanted to.

And it's cold. Not cold enough to snow, but cold rain isn't fun either. It's been "strangely warm" they say, without snow, but apparently January is due for a heavy storm season. Woo.

Then I hit Saturday. Saturday was the worst. I woke up not feeling well, and my nerves were on edge. And everything went wrong. We walked clear out to the limits of Zagreb looking for a referral, who didn't end up existing. By the end of the night, I had had plenty of walking time and more thinking time. My bad attitude led me to thoughts of home, and pretty much everything to do with home. I thought of my friends and family, individually. I ran scenes of fun and joy through my head with each of my siblings, and my closest friends. I then looked around me at the dark city that Zagreb seemed to be, and thought on all the failure we had experienced the past few days. I was angry with my companion, so I was very maturely not speaking to him as we walked.  It was still cold and raining, and windy too.  I thought about the last 5 months, and instead of gratitude and a sense of accomplishment, I felt frustration and anger and sadness. I was upset with myself, and with others who I felt had wronged me, and at the world for my misfortunes.

Soon, I felt hot tears freezing to my face. I couldn't find one good reason to be here. I just wanted to give up and go back.

We returned to our apartment, I composed myself somewhat, we winded down the night with some planning, and I retired to bed early.  I soaked my pillow on one side and had to flip it over. I offered a short prayer where I just asked for help, and explained that I just didn't know what to do.

I slept soundly that night, all the way through the night without waking once. The next morning I felt peace and all the reasons I know I am here returned to my mind. Too many to write here. I went to church with my companion, jovially, and when we arrived, The AP's told me I would be returning to Beograd on Tuesday, that the other Elder who I was filling in for was going to be honorably sent home, and that Elder Stuart would stay with Elder Bennett, leaving no Elders in Varazdin. Sister Marks (not related to my trainer) is being sent down to Sarajevo, and so there is our crazy transfer wrapping itself up nicely!

The members greeted me so warmly that all the cold from the night before melted away. They asked me to bear my testimony in the meeting, and a sweet Spirit entered and calmed my heart. By the end of church, I knew why I was here and I was excited to be. The hurt was replaced with excitement for this adventure. That night we found an awesome man and the Elders will teach him and his wife sometime this week. All just went well.

And so we go. Who knows what challenges and adventures await this week back in Serbia, but all I can know for sure is that I am never alone. I've learned more about my Savior this week than I have in a long time. I testify that He lives, and that He knows us perfectly, because He is always with us. I know that there is always a ram in the thicket provided when we have sacrificed and given what we think to be our all. And each time, we become a bit more, and then we are able to give a bit more the next time around.

I love you all! Until next week!

Elder Hixon

P.S. I also ate Chicken soup with chicken stomachs in it this week!

I Couldn't Be Happier!

WELL. I am back. Sorta.

So let me give the skinny. I'm a bit rusty at this and I'm rather disoriented. That, and I am currently chatting with my boy Wyatt!!!! Er, Elder Rogers!! Oh how good that feels. Back on the same continent.

Previously, in the life of Jacob Hixon:

After you guys dropped me at the port, I did my usual thing and boarded an airplane. That was cool, and en route to Chicago I got to see a BEAUTIFUL view of downtown Chicago as we flew over the semi frozen great lake.  It was so legit. Then, after I landed I was looking forward (not) to that long and lonely layover, when I bumped into a tag wearing gentleman. Which was weird, because all traveling missionaries would've already traveled before Wednesday afternoon....and then I saw his last name on his English tag, Elder Leppanen (with those cool two dots over the A).

I started talking to him, and turns out he had just finished his mission in Minnesota, and he is from Finland. His name is Eeki, and we ate lunch and talked the whole 5 hours, boarded the same plane (he helped me when I nearly got ready to go to Dubai or something) to London, and then we hung out in London until we parted ways. What a cool guy, and a tremendous blessing for a very disoriented and anxious and scared young missionary (me). He's legit, and I now have a friend in Finland :)

So then I flew to Zagreb. It was good to smell that freshly cigaretted Balkan air, and it was COLD. The Goodsells picked me up from the airport as promised, which was such a good reunion, and they proceeded to drive me to the chapel in Zagreb, where the Christmas conference was taking place. When I pulled up (looking as fresh to death as the living can get) President Rowe came out with Sister Rowe. Bishop nailed it when he described how that meeting would unfold, and it was an incredible feeling that I can't describe to be welcomed back by him. Tears all around!!  He then took me inside, and had me wait back while he went to announce a Christmas surprise to the missionaries all assembled.  My heart was pounding as he did so, and then I walked out and let me tell you, Bruce Wayne has never walked into a party with such a reception. It was an uproar, and especially my missionaries from my MTC group.  Seeing them again blew me away. It was about as close as I know to when we die and pass into the next life and meet our loved ones again. I couldn't have been happier. Elder Sheridan and Elder McAllister and Sister Brothersen and Sister Matthews and Sister Mortensen were there and it was just the best day of my life, hands down. I missed Sister Crump by a few days as she is in Macedonia for a month or so, just being the warrior champ she is filling in, and Sister Flanders because she has a Visa problem that has her stuck in Slovenia until she goes home for good. Yikes.

So that was a good time. The night was young and yet we all went our separate ways. Sort of.  I went back to the Rowe's.

Quick stories. I was able to work for a little bit with Elder Sheridan, and that was pretty fun (he's AP so he lives here in Zagreb) and man our MTC teachers would have been proud!! Elder Sheridan and I strolling around town 11 months later! He is way good at the language now, hot dang. I have work to do. 

Also, there was another very visible miracle, (more so than I have already shared).

When I landed, President Rowe pulled me aside after a bit and told me that there was a situation unfolding. There was an Elder here who was going home early for belated confession. He did not know that when President told me (the elder) he was waiting to find out whether he was going to have to or not (like I did). President said he was going to tell him after the conference, and that he would be staying at the Rowe's that night and the next day, and I would be too. It was timed so perfectly, and I had the opportunity to spend time with him and tell him how my story went and how it felt, gave him the reality and advice for being back, encouraging pep talks or what have you. It was a humbling experience, to see that I was needed the very day that I arrived. He is an awesome guy, and it was good to be with him up until we saw him off early Saturday morning. What a blessing being a part of that experience was.

I hung out with the twins (the Rowe's twins) for a little while that Saturday morning, and Sister Rowe joined us and we made German Pancakes and had real syrup ) Sister Rowe made it. SO GOOD.

Then President Rowe called me up to his office. We had a good talk, and then he told me the earth shattering news. There is another Elder here who is having medical problems. He is serving in Zagreb, and he needs to be at the mission home for a week or so.....

so that means President Rowe asked me to serve in Zagreb.

Zagreb. Croatia.

So here I am! The current arrangement is that I serve here with Elder Bennet (he went into the MTC end of July) until Saturday. I was told I can then return home to Beograd, but we will see depending on the other Elder's health. Prayers, my friends!

That's basically it. Elder Bennett is cool. He is hard working so this week should go well. We had a lesson with an inactive member on Saturday, and we have two lessons scheduled with investigators tonight.  My Serbian is thick here (which just means I say certain things that get weird looks) and my language is decent enough. I can still understand conversations, be it that I pick them apart when I don't know certain words, and people can understand whatever I say. So that's good.

The Zagreb branch is 20 active members or so more than Beograd's and it is incredible. There is a large Primary (10 to 12 I think?) and they got to have a showdown with Santa on Saturday night. Being with this Branch has reset my resolve for the work in Beograd. It has been incredible and beyond words.

It has been very hard though. Likely one of the hardest things I have ever done.  Adjusting is wrecking my body, and everything else. It feels harder this time, and I get homesick differently. I am just wanting to get through it at times. Its also hard that Elder Wade and Adams and Marks and everyone else I knew is already home. That can get tough. I think of the good old days in Beograd, and I know they won't ever be exactly as they were with the new people. But work gets those thoughts away! 

Gotta move forward, as with all things!

Lastly, I love and miss you all. Keep on the work on the home front (or the other abroad fronts....or wherever).

Love,
Elder Hixon (check that out)

Mom, P.S.

My new temporary comp had us deep clean the apartment this morning. Thought you would like that. It was....nice. I think I am going to learn a lot this week with this elder.

"For ye are bought with a price"

It would seem as though I am going to be continuing the weekly email update.

It has been a wild week! After a whirlwind of visits from family and friends, I felt that I had been sufficiently blessed in that everyone has shown me nothing but love and support. It is a good feeling.

 I found myself experiencing a new kind of jet lag I am not familiar with. On this end, I experience less midday crashes, but instead it is an ongoing battle around 8pm to stay awake and around 4am to stay asleep. My first night of sleep felt like 2 months and I found it had only been 2 hours. Slowly, but surely, I am adjusting. Just in time to head back out. 

Early last week I began the work of planning the next 6 months. I needed something solid to keep me very productive, and be able to fulfill my spiritual, educational, and financial needs. As I sought the guidance of the Spirit in these decisions, I found myself very much needing a miracle. I had too little time to get things together, and time was moving by without waiting for me to find solutions. I was to be on a mission this time of year, not looking for school and work! The stress was sure to be unbearable if I didn't find answers quickly. Part of me (a small, insignificant part that was very quickly given the invitation to get lost) thought that I might have stayed on my mission to avoid all these decisions and stresses, on me and my family.

But I knew in Whom I had trusted, so I moved forward.

Within a day I received a message from my Dad that read:

Dallan Schmidt wants to know if you need work, give him a call.

Shortly thereafter I met with him, and had a job working full time, with a schedule to match my expectations for classes in the evenings, and with one of the coolest people I know. 

Classes for most schools are starting real soon, and I had no idea how to even register. A few days before my parents received the phone call that I was coming home, they had found a program that has classes online through BYU-I and for a modest price. That miracle aside, I still had to make a decision and fast of what I was to do and how to go about doing it. At church on Sunday, I was in the hall visiting with my Bishop, when a Senior couple serving as missionaries came over to us. They live in Queen Creek, and my Bishop greeted them very friendly, and then asked them why they were there. They said that that morning they felt they should come to our Ward and come see Bishop Everton (who they knew one way or another) and it just so turns out that they are representatives for that same program and are in charge of this area. They gave me the things necessary to quickly accomplish getting classes started, and we had a good conversation; I am not alone in this.

I looked to see if there were any institute classes that could fit in my schedule, and found that there were, and one of them is taught by the same guy who taught mine a year ago, and he was the best. 

My email was flooded with emails from missionaries and friends and family, all of whom built me up and showed me an outpouring of love. My phone goes off often with numbers I don't recognize with people asking me how I am doing and letting me know they love me and are proud of me (after identifying themselves.) My grandparents were in town, and my reunion with them and my extended family here brought me such joy and warmth.

I am finding myself happier and more confident and at peace every day. I attribute these and all the blessings that I am drowning in as a direct result of my partaking in the Atonement and its healing power, and the love and faith of those around me. I am beyond grateful for these incredible people I am blessed to know, and for the grace that is being offered to me, seemingly immediately. I am beginning to see that while there is time involved in the healing process, The Lord will bless us the moment we turn our trust over to Him. In small ways, in sometimes more visible ways, but regardless of how, He will bless us and give us affirmation that He is proud of us and with us the whole way.

For ye are bought with a price (1 Corinthians 6:20)

I have been thinking of that line a lot this week. I think of the sacrifices that have been made on my behalf to get me to where I am, the prices they've paid to get me here physically and otherwise. I carry on my person the 50 euro that President Rowe gave me when I left for emergencies on my journey, partly because I promised him right away that I would return it to him when I came back, (with black licorice) and also to remind me of those sacrifices made by my friends on my behalf. And with each miracle I see wrought by God's grace and their sacrifices, I hold that 50 euro and remember that I have been bought with a price. Purely symbolic, but it helps me to remember and "stand fast in tht liberty wherewith God hath made (me) free"(Alma 61:21). 

"For ye are bought with a price."

What is that price, and what, then, does that make us worth?

For it is expedient that there should be a great and last sacrifice; yea, not a sacrifice of man, neither of beast, neither of any manner of fowl; for it shall not be a human sacrifice; but it must be an infinite and eternal sacrifice. (Alma 34:10)

I am learning what that means a little more each day.

Love,

Jake

Culture Shock Round Two

Culture shock round two.

I'm home, for those of you who aren't aware. This will be my last email for a while, my next chapter doesn't include a weekly update email. 

For close to a year now, I've been praying for forgiveness. At times I feel enlightened or feel the Spirit work through me, or some other sort of answer to my prayers, and then at other times I know, deep down somewhere that I refused to think about, that I pushed out and mentally blocked off, that I had not been forgiven. Time came close for my mission, and I could not bring myself to crush everyone around me, my Dad, my Mom, my siblings, 3 of which will serve their own missions and I felt responsible for showing a good example, my sisters who I couldn't bear to hurt, my friends who would all be ashamed of me and hurt in their way, my cousins who were getting ready to serve, some of whom have since left for their missions, and some who are much younger. My grandparents on both sides, aunts and uncles, everyone. What would they say? And how would it affect them? Maybe some not at all, maybe some a lot. 

So I lied.

I lied to my Bishop, I lied to my Stake President, my parents, my friends and relatives. I lied when I presented myself as one worthy to represent The Lord. Those lies hurt me in ways I can't explain. I sought the Spirit, did my best to learn from the best books and read my scriptures and keep some measure of the Spirit with me. I went to the MTC. At times I felt the guilt, but I was able to bury it. I truly did feel the Spirit, and I was happy. But in the back of my mind, it was still there. I received Priesthood blessings, and I prayed harder than I ever have in my life. There was no turning back at this point, and I needed understanding and help from the Lord, even if I couldn't receive forgiveness. I guess my backup plan was to "settle" the score when I returned home. 

But as I left the MTC and came to these people, I began to learn what it means to be a missionary. I felt a love for these people that I cannot explain in the slightest, even when they spit on me, scream curses at me, are blatantly rude and ignorant, when I saw the wickedness and atrocities entertained by these people, details of which I will leave out. The horrors I've seen here were enough to prick my Spirit, but the beauties were even more. For all the lows there were blessings and miracles to counteract them. I felt the Spirit work through me as I taught Nana and Zoe. I've truly felt things happening, perhaps as an answer to their faith rather than my worthiness, or lack thereof.

Two Fridays ago, after I had been wrestling with this pain more than ever before this last week or so, President Rowe was giving us instruction in a Zone Conference. He's very inspired, and he's a dang stud. We were talking about regular Zone Conference things, running through things and the lot, and then in the second half, he stood up and said he had a change to the schedule. He ditched the second half of the program and talked about something he said he felt prompted to talk about. We discussed how we are to do this work the Lord's way. We talked about having faith and being obedient, and about working hard, and then we got to sanctification. We talked about how necessary it is for us to be free from the bonds of sin. We spoke of the Atonement and of sacrifice. I felt like he was speaking directly at me, and then I realized he was when he said, "Elder Hixon, will you read these verses (insert verses here)?" I did, and then I was asked to expound on them. It was so hard to keep my face collected when inside my soul was literally being rent in pieces. I knew right there that I could not go on like this anymore.

At the conclusion of the conference, I privately went to President Rowe and asked him if I could speak with him. He hugged me and told me that he loved me, and that he knew I would come back. We agreed for the next morning, and considering he was staying in a hotel in Novi Beograd, and we lived deep into Novi Beograd, we agreed to meet there. It was an interesting setting for such an interview, but it worked.That night I felt relieved already, knowing that I was going the right way, and the Lord was blessing me with peace.Then, the next morning, I woke up with the biggest weight on me. I literally felt weak, and struggled to move. I built up the strength and got ready for the day, but I honestly cannot describe how it felt. I was carrying the weight of the world. Everything that could go wrong went wrong, and everything was playing out in my head. I was trembling, I didn't eat because I would have surely thrown it up, and I felt condemned. I was so afraid. But we went. Every step took effort, the entire tram ride I felt the powers of Hell racking me. I needed to back out so badly, except that I had already committed to President Rowe on this, I technically didn't have a way out.

I felt abandoned and I didn't understand why. I continued only because I knew it was right. 

"Do what is right, let the consequence follow," 

took on a newer, more terrifying meaning. Nothing made sense, I truly felt doomed.

But this is what I had to do.

I told my Mission President everything.

And I walked away from that hotel building knowing two things. First, I knew I had a very good chance of going home and whatever followed was out of my hands. Second, I knew that for the first time in a long time, I was headed back in the right direction. I knew this because of the immediate peace that overcame me. I remember feeling it was as though I had been carrying a boulder up a mountain, and I finally let it go. I should have left it at the bottom, because I don't have the most control over what damage it will cause now, but I feel relieved that it is gone. Perhaps that is a bad analogy; one really shouldn't drop boulders down mountains, that isn't safe. But that is how I felt. I knew consequences were ahead, but I no longer cared. What mattered to me was my standing with God.

I began to suffer. For what was the longest week of my life, we waited. Without the power that comes from being worthy, I felt truly useless in the field. We worked hard, and we did our best. It was a roller coaster. There were highs, and there were lows. But mostly lows. I felt cut off as it were. I couldn't feel the Spirit and I relied completely on my companion for that.

All week we waited, and I suffered. I truly began to wonder if there was an end to this all. Then, on Saturday, we watched Nana and Zoe enter the waters of baptism. That is a story in and of itself, but my journal has that down. I felt a wave of peace, a sort of closure. I was satisfied that, while I could've done things better, The Lord used me and helped this wonderful couple by their faith in Him. I went home that night feeling a small sense of peace. Then I received a phone call. 

I was told that the decision was made that I would best be able to heal an be forgiven and made whole at home. I was told that I could return in 6 months. I left shortly after church and the Confirmations for Zagreb, where I stayed the evening. I was greeted by love from the Rowe family and Sister Madsen (round three) and by my parents via phone. I spoke with President Rowe and we got me in order to leave the following morning. I received more strength and support that night than I had in a long time, and I'll never forget it.

I left on a plane at 6:30am from Zagreb to Brussels, Belgium, and then onto London, England, and finally the transatlantic to Phoenix. They lost my luggage, so that's frustrating, but I was greeted with warm hearts and friendly hands. My parents and my bishop picked me up, and the reunion was sweeter than I had imagined. As I heard from various aunts, uncles, and friends, they, too, told me they were proud of me and quelled my fears. My siblings have been nothing but supportive and loving and everything I need them to be. The love has been overwhelming.

I have work to do. I am going to be a much better person when I leave again in 6 months, but most importantly, I will KNOW where I stand with my God, and I will know I am right in His eyes. And I want nothing more.

Thank you all for the love and support at this time. I apologize to those I have hurt, and I am seeking to right the wrongs I have caused. I love my Savior, now more than ever, and I believe in His healing that He offers to all. I feel it, and will continue to. I feel the strength from the verses, now more than ever:

"My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes. Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands....Know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than He? Therefore, hold on thy way....fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever."

Dok se ne nademo,

- Jacob Hixon

Then Sings My Soul

We had a pretty interesting week this week. Last P Day we were wearing our proselyting clothes because we were not sure when we may see Nana before going to Montenegro. It was lame, because everybody was playing volleyball and the like, and we were slightly hindered by that. (Only slightly.) But the Lord had plans in mind! As I was emailing President Rowe, a man sitting next to me leans over and asks me in English if I am from the Mormon church. I said yes. Turns out he is from the Czech Republic and was on a vacation tour with friends through the former Yugoslavia, and he was in Serbia for a day. He has a friend who lives in the Czech Republic who speaks Serbian (she's from Serbia) who asked him if, while he was here, that he could find the Mormons and get her a Book of Mormon in Serbian. She can't read Czech, and she wants to read it, and the coolest part was he was leaving Serbia in 2 hours, he was at the cafe checking his Facebook and was actually talking to her when we started talking. I spaced and realized I didn't have a Book of Mormon on me (what kind of missionary?!) but the Elders from Sremska were here and Elder Despain had one on him. I called him over, and we gave the man a Book of Mormon. I talked with him for a while, and while he said at the moment he was not interested in the Church for religious purposes, he told me that he had always heard that Mormons were good people, and he also had done studies on them from a nonreligious standpoint, and said that he likes that we are raised to be good people. I told him that our religion is just that, we try to help people become better people and more like our Heavenly Father. He was very impressed with our meeting, said it couldn't have been by chance, and said to me, "You've proved right to me what I've heard and learned. The Mormons are good people." I was unable to get his contact information, if I remember correctly, he lives around or in Prague. I believe his name was Aleksandar (whatever the Czech rendition of that is) and he was a good man.

I realize, Elder Payne, that that doesn't help much. But if he's being prepared enough to interact with us in Belgrade and have a good experience, then I am sure that the Lord will direct him to you or other missionaries in Czech. Or his friend who now has the Book of Mormon.

Either way, I felt blessed to be a part of that experience.

We also had an exchange this week. Elder Radakovic came into my area with me, and Elder Wade and Bates went out to Cacak. It was a way fun exchange, and Elder Radakovic taught me very much. I know that these countries are in good hands with a man like him. Unlike a lot of the young people here, even the members, he wants to stay here. He was born in Serbia, in Novi Sad I believe. And he lived there and down in Nis. He at some point moved to Slovenia and lived in Celje ever since. So he speaks English, Serbian (and the dialects therein, as well as the Croatian and Bosnian differentiations) and also Slovene. He was introduced to the Gospel by his neighbor. Neither of his parents are members, "Not yet," he says in a Batman voice. He is 26, and he is a SERB. I love that. He is a man of humble faith and power, and decided to serve his mission he says, "Because what better thing is there than to serve the Lord?" 

He got me into reading Isaiah, because it's a commandment in 3 Nephi 23 (if I remember the reference) and also because, he says, "Isaiah truly saw our day, and we are promised to be able to understand him, and anyone who reads Isaiah will thereby find himself therein." And it's been the biggest blessing to do so. He's a stud, he'll probably be in the District Presidency and eventually become a general authority or apostle, the first from Serbia. He's the best there is.

We also had an incredible Zone Conference this week. We learned so much and we had a great time. Nana and Zoe have been in contact with the Elders in Podgorica in Montenegro, and they are getting baptized Saturday, and confirmed Sunday. I'm so excited I can hardly contain it! It will be such a blessing for them. I was able to speak to Nana on the phone 2 days ago to see how things were, and it was so good to hear from them. They could really use prayers, we're hoping they get his visa today and that they head home today.

"Then sings my soul, my Savior, God to Thee. How great Thou art! How great Thou art!" That's been stuck in my head, and it's so true. No matter what happens, if we press forward, we will find the assurance that we are right with our God and our King, and when we are right with Him, He says, "Fear not, I am with thee, Oh be not dismayed. For I am THY God, and will still give thee aid. I'll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand." He is OUR God, and He will make all our wrongs right, and all our sorrows turned to experience for our good, that we will be able to stand with confidence. That is all that matters, that we are right with Him, and let the rest follow, whatever the consequences be.

I love you all. We are hard at work and the blessings are coming for this wonderful land. It is harder than ever, but it is worth it.

Love,
Elder Hixon

Kisses from God

Hey!

We had a wild week, let me just say it like that! Except it was mostly normal. I have three highlights and that is kind of it.

First, I met a legit Irish man. He's a lawyer who has lived here for 4 years, and a year before that in Sarajevo. His Serbian was flawless, but his English was even better....because of the accent. Killer! I was sitting in the Police Station waiting while Elder Wade was getting Visa work done, and two guys sit next to me. I was going to talk to them, but they were in some conversation. One stands up eventually, and goes to get some work done, so it's just me and this guy. Before I can say anything, he asks me in his gnarly Irish, "So how are the Mormons doing in Belgrade?" I just about died and said, "How do you know who we are?" He responds, "Everyone knows who you are!" Can I say fulfillment of prophecy somewhere? I don't recall it, but I'm sure it's somewhere. We're a known people, and the Lord's work is going forward boldy and nobly and independent. We talked for a while and I got his story, and hopefully we'll meet at some point this week. He said he had two friends when he was living in Manchester that were Mormon, and he said they were good people and good friends. I have no doubt that they gave him whatever he needed to open up while we talked. Member missionary work, my friends, the Lord takes it in any way!

Second, Nana and Zoe. They weren't baptized this week. But there's a cool story behind that. 

We had everything lined up for it, but they felt that they should wait until after Nana's trip to Montenegro, even though Zoe wanted to do it before so she could have those blessings while she was alone with the kids for a few days. We talked with them about it, but they decided to wait. We had been prompted, but it seemed to no avail. Then, President Rowe called us the next morning to ask how Nana and Zoe were. He had been praying for them and about them, and he felt that he should call us and see how things were. When we filled him in, he challenged us to go back again that day and invite them again to be baptized this last weekend before the trip. He told us he felt prompted to do so. He said he wasn't sure what the outcome would be, but he knew that we'd be blessed if we obeyed. So we did. 

We went and met with Nana and Zoe, and when we committed them again, they agreed immediately that they would be baptized that weekend. Then, as we were going over the full list of questions for the baptismal interview with them, which we needed to because it was Thursday and we needed to have them interviewed the next day, and during those questions something came up. We spoke about it, and we decided the baptism would need to be put off for a bit. I'd never had that happen before, and Elder Wade was entertaining Johan temporarily (we were at a park, so Johan was playing) and so I went with the Spirit and told him that the reason the Lord had sent us there that day to recommit them was to help them to bring up that concern. I told him we would call President Rowe and that he would help to work that out with them and the Lord.

It was very hard to see that baptism go, when we had it set for certain. But the Lord blessed us for our obedience when we would've otherwise not know that concern until a few days before the rescheduled date, and it would've likely not happened this transfer, which could mean I'm gone. President is going to interview them and we will go from there, but the 27th is the new date. President thinks that will work fine. Things have been getting worse in some ways, just hard times and things to overcome. It seems the whole world is conspiring against us at times! But, we will prevail, I have no doubt!!

Third, as Coach Hornbeck always said "Do you feel that, boys? That's kisses from God!" He was always referring to any breeze that picked up in practice, but he made a point to stop everything and point it out. It was, in his own way, some sort of recognition and thanks for that blessing. Did it change that we still had practice? No. Did it change that it was dang hard, or our situation at all? No. But it was a kiss, giving us just enough of a boost. Well we got one last night. 

We got a phone call and a text message telling us some gnarly news. I've been actually praying for something of this sort to happen, and it happened! Remember in I believe my first email when I told you about Viki Tadic? The first member in Bosnia, that President Rowe and his family taught while he was working in Belgrade and living in Banja Luka? Remember how she was the first native member that I met? How strong her testimony was, and how she served a mini mission in Zadar? Well, she's a great friend and she's awesome as all get up. The Lord, however, reminded me more so of that AND that he is mindful of me and where I am. She just received her mission call.

Sister Tadic has been called to serve in the newly created ARIZONA, GILBERT MISSION!!!!!! How can you say that is anything short of a miracle? She reports to the MTC in the beginning of December, so take care of her for Christmas and just be prepared for the most prepared Sister Missionary this world's ever seen, and get your friends ready to hear the good news of the Gospel coming from somebody whose testimony can shake the very mountains. Talk to the mission president, get in good to get her assigned to our home ward, do whatever you can, but be ready! And I'll be home for her last 6 months!

That was the best news ever, and we needed it! Elder Wade and I about went nuts.

All in all, it was a week of struggles with a relief at the end just enough to push me on for this week!

I love and miss you all! Thank you for the prayers on our behalves and on those of the people here, they are truly felt.

Love,
Elder Hixon

REAL FOOD!

This is lame, I apologize but I have no time for a general email this week. Is that dumb or what?! Just log it in the books as another week in the life of a Serbian missionary.

Highlights:

1) 4th of July was SICK. Can't say it compares to being on that sacred American soil....but the Glenn's had us over (embassy family) and we had REAL FOOD! They barbecued burgers and hot dogs for us (heaven) and we had ranch and American brand condiments and Doritos and life was just so American. I EVEN GOT DR. PEPPER!! Does it get better? No, I'm afraid it doesn't.

2) Found trampolines on the Ada last P Day....backflips have never been so sweet.

3) That's it....Nana and Zoe's baptism should be this Saturday, I'll get more details on that tonight! I'm sending pictures to hopefully make up for this pathetic email....

But the work must go on! And we're in charge of pressing it on!

I love you and miss you all!

Love,

Elder Hixon


A few things he sent to my email that might be of interest.

*The sun comes up here at like 4:30 in the morning and goes down at 8:30 at night. It's killing me..

*My bet is on one of my friends here getting called to the Gilbert Arizona mission. Robert (cool story about him I'll share someday) got his call to Ukraine a week ago. That was way cool. Vladan has an interview with President Rowe this weekend then his papers will go in. Katarina's go in in January probably, and Viktorija's sometime next year. Very exciting business over here!

*No baptism yet. We will know tonight more on that, hitting a few roadblocks, but only ones for delay, they're still determined. It'll be either this Saturday or the next. We will see. I got in touch with Nemanja a few days ago. He's as awesome as ever, I'll let you know when we meet with him again.

A few pics of his new apartment

Babysitting Boegrad

Well hello world! 

This week was nuts. Not a lot to report though...just the stress of missionary work is so real. I tell Elder Wade all the time "my soul is racked with eternal torment" when things start going to parts. I swear, it feels like we're trying to babysit Beograd. It's so much work and man, it's rough. We did a lot of inviting to try and meet our goal of 10,000 invites to church this week, and so on Saturday, we went to town and got 400. Can't say we've seen the fruits of those labors yet...but no worries.

But, not to say missionary work isn't the same a lot....but sometimes it is.....I mean, to me every day is different, but it probably won't sound a ton different to anybody else. So, sorry if this email lacks a ton of substance.

A few quick stories. We watched that missionary members broadcast in District meeting, and wow....that was like General Conference on crack, cause it was all about missionary work! It was soul stirring and it tugged at the ol' heartstrings. I loved it.  I learned a ton, and though I was at times jealous of the missions who are directly affected by this conference (i.e. not here...), I still took a ton away from it, and we are going to employ it as much as we can here. We still go tracting most every night, and we contact every day, nearly wherever we go.  Member referrals....don't usually happen, and anything we accomplish is a miracle. Because our efforts alone aren't good enough and I doubt they ever will be. But seeing the wards' abilities to work together brought a glimpse of what these branches can one day have, and even that they can partake of it now. So, we're getting right on that.

Nana and Zoe are going to be (it's official now) baptized in a week from Saturday!!! They have been having a lot of struggles, and indirectly us too, but they are pulling through by faith! We taught them the Word of Wisdom this last week, asking them why we receive commandments and why we should follow them, and their answers were simple and profound. Zoe, at the end of the lesson, went unprompted by us, and threw out all their coffee, and they both agreed that if it is from the Lord, it is for them, regardless of them maybe not knowing why. They have expressed their desire to raise their kids right, and not having the best examples to do so, and they feel peace and closer as a family when at church or meeting with us, and we've promised them that continued feeling once they've received the Gift of the Holy Ghost after baptism. It's been a miracle in the works, but the visa stuff is basically worked out. How about that!!! 

Other than that....it's been stormy all week! Which has been way nice. Nemanja should be back in town today...so we'll hopefully begin teaching him again.

That's all I have for this week. Thank you all for your support and prayers, they are felt here and I can't express my gratitude.

I love and miss you

Elder Hixon

Stubborn Faith and a Little Ice Cream

Well, it's hot as the Dickens out here.

But for real. The humidity is going to kill me. It's SO hot. I'm sweating bullets all dang day and I'm about as brown as brown gets. We're all moved in, had our housewarming party and made tacos (Elder Bates had some taco seasoning from home) and WOW Mexican food is good. But we realized that we have no clima (AC unit thing) and so we about died the first few nights. We bought two fans and got a modified air pusher thing from our landlord....and get this. After the first night, my fan shorted out. So....I'm dying. It's so hot, and I don't do humid hot, you know? I'm a dry heat-roast alive kind of guy. And, our commute from our place by walking and by hot, crowded bus, is 45 minutes- an hour for anything in Old Belgrade, so for like church and meetings and the like. So. Not complaining in the least, I love it, just welcome to the life :)

For the physical aspects of life real quick, we're doing well. We worked on the Vasica farm again in the blazing heat, no problems there. On Friday we headed out to Bosnia for our Zone activity (which means more stamps for the passport, and I've hit 3 countries of our 4... Life's cool) and that was so much fun. I was wrong, however, and sorely upset, that our activity did not include the Bosnian Zone. Which meant, no Sister Crump or Elder Sheridan. Life's hard sometimes. But it was such a fun trip. I did get to spend time with my awesome zone, which means the 3 Gilbert chaps united once more, as well as being with Sister Matthews and Sister Mortensen, and Elder Rad (my "first" companion on the mission. If you remember, he was my companion for a day and a half in Zagreb and in route to Beograd. He's a funny Australian.) We went to some replica ethnic village.

Can't say it was the major tourist attraction, and it was infinity degrees outside, but I'm learning to not give a care where I'm at as long as I'm with awesome people. It was way fun, hanging around, playing soccer and other games (besides Sister Mortensen almost taking my leg off!!) and being with the Rowes. I love that family! They're so much fun. To wrap it all up we had Palacinke and ice cream, which is way dang good combo, and that's that.

We had our Zone conference for this month, during which I had many very personal answers to my prayers come through those in my zone as we trained together on Thursday. As usual, we learned, we grew, we laughed, and life was good. We had two lessons with Nana AND Zoe this week, three with Nana. This gets real good. So lately we've been meeting with Nana, and not as often with Zoe, jsut things have been crazy hectic for them, and etc. But we were speaking with Nana earlier in the week and we emphasized to him the need to meet with Zoe also. He told us, very humbly, that he understands, and he wants nothing more than to be baptized WITH her, so he told us he would hold off on his baptismal date, and do all he could to take the kids off Zoe's hands and give her the atmosphere to learn more and such. It was a humbling experience. But it gets better. We had a lesson with them and the Goodsells (senior couple) and it went very well, we were able to address concerns they had, have a very uplifting experience, and the best feeling in the world came again to me, that feeling of when the Spirit is working through you. When you open your mouth to talk, having a vague idea of what to say, but just going with it, and then the words start coming out perfectly, and you know they aren't yours, as you feel that Presence working in and through you. It feels so incredible, and it brings tears to my eyes when I testify under that influence. I love being blessed with those confirmations.

(last pic with Elder Marks and Nana and Zoe)

Our second lesson with them was even better, and it was so humbling. Up to this point, we knew that Zoe liked church, she was reading and praying, but we knew we just needed more time to work with her and see where her testimony was at. We includes Nana. The three of us were passing early judgement, however good our intentions were, and the Lord came to tell us we were wrong!! We met with them both, and with President Rowe after the Zone Conference. Teaching with him, first off, is an EXPERIENCE. He is so....much a stud. That's the best compliment I have to sum it all up. We began, and spoke for a bit to all get to know each other, and then I asked Nana and Zoe to look back over the past 2 months or so and then to now, and evaluate where they were at, how they felt, etc. Zoe started, and President Rowe is the question ASKER. Everything he asks, every pause and silent moment, every answer returned in question form, everything was done so magnificently that I knew my abilities were so weak compared to his! It was humbling, and inspiring! But the best is yet to come. Zoe bore her testimony to us. She told us how she felt, how things have changed over the past 2 months, and how she KNOWS this Church is true, because she has felt the Spirit so strongly in every aspect of it, and she KNOWS that God wouldn't send His Spirit to a false church. President Rowe committed her to be baptized then, and he explained baptism so eloquently and with such....awesomeness that they both expressed how they want to be baptized as soon as possible. We were blown away, Nana, Elder Wade and I, by Zoe's testimony. It was humbling for all of us. 

We have them scheduled for a week from this Saturday, because of the visa problems that we are working on with them and our Branch President. (that's another story, a good one, but no time for it. Rest assured it's working out. Your prayers have been heard, appreciated, and answered. Thank you, more than I can say.) Church yesterday was incredible, just having their whole family come, again and again. I love it. I love Johan, even though he can be a little pill :) Everything has been working together for these amazing experiences, all the heartaches and hard times with all that's been going on, but with what Nana calls "stubborn faith" we've begun to see the fruits and man do they look so good!!!

2 quick stories then I'm done! First, at our housewarming party, Elder Wade and Elder Proud were playing chess while the taco meat was cooking, and we found the Elder Radakovic is like a grandmaster at chess. Like he studies it further than one can study a subject. But he wouldn't play. I asked him why, and after a bit he told me this bit of wisdom. 

"Chess is not a bad game. But I gave up so much of my time to it, so much time wasted. And for what? It made me competitive. Did it make me a better man? No. I have better things I can do with my time, and those things will make me a better man." 

He put up his "weapons of rebellion" in a sense. Made me do some reflecting and thinking. He's such a stud, really. He reads Isaiah all the time too, which is funny. 

Second. Elder Wade and I were talking to President Pavlovic about Nana and Zoe in a meeting with him. Because of the seriousness of the situation, and whatever else, I let Elder Wade explain (Serbian's rough, you know.) Then President Pavlovic asked me to explain something, and I turned to Elder Wade because I couldn't think of the right words to adequately explain. President stopped me, and related this story to me. Translated, he said: 

"I lived in Novi Sad for 15 years. I knew that city. But if I was ever driving with someone who was actually from Novi Sad, I would turn to them for directions. Elder Hixon, you know this language. I know that you can talk to me because you have before, and it's hard, very hard and you have a long way to go, but I know you know how to do it. Don't turn to others, speak your assigned language."

I saluted such a command, and did my best. I thought about it, and I feel like we all do that quite often. We always turn to someone "better qualified" in our mind, when called on to do something. Moses did it, Enoch, a lot of people responded to calls with excuses for their inadequacy. I remember before my mission, both as a ward missionary and not, I would refrain from doing missionary work when opportunities arose, because "I wasn't qualified," or someone else was more so. We are ALL called to this work! I echo President Pavlovic's words when I say that we know this Gospel, so get the heck out and share it! Nobody is more qualified, and regardless, the Lord will and does qualify us, He just asks that we are willing.

That's all! I love and miss you and appreciate the prayers and support! Til next week...

Love,

Elder Hixon 

THIS mission was made for me

So, this week has been wild, and it gets more wild this coming week.

First, today isn't P Day. I'm short on email time, (no surprises) but then we are out hitting the pavement again. We have a Zone Conference on Thursday and then the Serbian and Bosnian Zones on Friday are going to a Bosnian ethnic village for a Zone activity, which will be our P Day. But we email today. That Village we're going to may not be Lake Bled in Slovenia or the nuts waterfalls in Croatia whose names escape me (the Slovenia and Croatia Zones get the goods), but its an ethnic village in Bosnia. I'm stoked, you're stoked, we're all stoked.

So, that's that.

WE MOVED THIS MORNING. You heard me. We got out of our dump of an apartment, and our new one is way nice. It's right by the Sava, and it's on the 14th floor of the building, so we can see everything. It's got a ton of space, a sanitary bathroom, and it's in the PERFECT location. I'm talking a giant family park, infinity buildings, 3 legit groceries nearby, other cool features that none of you will appreciate...but it's real nice. Our landlord is cool, she does that artwork stuff that's like the pictures and texturized walls that come out at you, like 3D? It's sweet, and I will have to take pictures once we're all settled, but for now, I will forward Mom pictures of the apartment that Sister Goodsell sent me. It's sweet!

So, I'll be jumbled and all over the place, bear with me.

Last Monday, we had a way cool experience. Elder Wade and I went out to go find a family who Elder Marks and Despain had taught twice before, but hadn't been able to get a hold of. We walked out to their place, and they weren't home. Lame. We were on the trek home, and I remembered our boy Dalibor all of the sudden. Elder Marks had met him my first night trakting, and he was way cool. We met him after being rejected in 3 10+ story buildings in a elevator leaving the last one. He took a Book of Mormon, and was way interested in meeting with us. He was way busy, however, and we were never able to meet with him. One day his phone stopped working, which is usually a sign that they aren't in the country. Elder Marks and I searched for him in that building maybe a month and a half ago, and the first door we knocked was this very nice, mid 20's girl who knew Dalibor and confirmed he was out of the country on work or something like that. She was maybe the nicest stranger I've met in Serbia. We thanked her, and for some reason left it at that.

So, Monday, I call Dalibor. Phone still off. I was ticked! I felt like I had been prompted, his name hadn't crossed my mind in over a month. I thought a bit, and figured we should keep looking for him. So Elder Wade and I went back into the building. I had no idea where he lived, but I remembered that girl's door. So we started with her. Her boyfriend answered the door, and then she also came to the door. They told us Dalibor had moved, and we weren't sure where they told us to, but not in Belgrade. The thought "what kind of prompting..." started to cross my mind, when the two invited us in.

2 new investigators, my friends. And perhaps the nicest I've ever met, and they are very interested. Their names are Marko and Tamara, and we meet with them again tonight. I learned a valuable lesson about following promptings. And when I'm not sure about the prompting, I ask myself, "does it invite me to do something good?" If yes, then we go. We were on an exchange this week, and I was clear out in the south end of Belgrade with Elder Marcek. I have some cool stories, but no time for them all. REMIND ME to tell you about some of them when I get home :)

But, we saw a girl running to catch a bus, and it could've easily waited, but it took off. I felt the impression to go talk to her, Elder Marcek and I discussed it for a second, and went. She appreciated her thanks that we were sorry she missed her bus, but told us off real good and said she wanted to hear nothing from us. No big. At least I showed the Lord we will listen to promptings, regardless of the outcome! Elder Marcek shaved my head that night. Aw YEAH it feels so good! Cause it's so hot outside, killer. And we have no AC. So....yeah, I like the cut. I'll send a picture if I have time...otherwise, next week for sure.

I've been reading "The Infinite Atonement" by Tad R. Callister. I STRONGLY recommend it, it's an incredible book. I'm learning so much every day from reading it.

Nana's baptism is likely going to have to be pushed again. This is lame!! It's all this legal work!! And Zoe isn't ready to be baptized yet, we're still working with her on her testimony, but the problem is we can hardly ever meet with both of them and have the duration of a lesson with them both present, because KIDS ARE NUTS. I love them so much but oh my goodness, I have never realized how crazy kids are. And Zoe always will take Johan out so we can have peace, and then we can't really help her learn or grow....it's very frustrating. And she's gone helping watch some friends' kids this week while they're visiting from Germany, and so we're kind of stuck right now. She wouldn't be likely able to attend the baptism if we had it Saturday, and ideally we'd have them baptized together...at the least have her there
.

So, please keep praying for them. They're as awesome as ever, and we all went out to Pancevo this week and had a family night with the Vasica's. It was good. Thank you for your prayers on their behalf already, and please keep them in them.

We have been having a lot of fun and a lot of success. I am very excited for what the next few weeks holds.

That's all folks! Til next week....

I love you all, and I miss you all.

Elder Hixon

P.S. (In another letter he sent me I loved when he said this)

Thank you for your prayers. All is well with us, things are crazy, but I'm growing so much, bit by bit, and I love being out here. Elder Wade nailed it when he said, "I didn't know how it'd be when I was expecting my call, but THIS mission was made for me."