MTC Week 4

Joj!


So this week was probably the hardest week yet! Which is sweet. 

First, I'd like to mention how much I do not like writing letters. Too many to write, too little time. I'm gettin' a few grays from the stress! (not really.) Last week I forgot to mention that Elder Sheridan and I were made Zone Leaders. It's been an awesome experience! 

It's something else, though, because half our zone is older than us by several weeks. To recap in case I haven't mentioned, our zone (best zone in the world) consists of the Serbo-Croats, the Czech-Slovaks, the Polish, and the Bulgarians. We are probably the smallest zone, and we can all fit on one table at lunch. It's awesome. And we're all so close, and united in our Eastern European pride it's ridiculous :) (However, there's about 6,000 Russians on the second floor of our building and they're all huge, intimidating brutes and we just yell Ruski's everytime its loud. haha)  Anyways, we lose our Poles tomorrow morning. And the Bulgars leave next week. It's real sad. They've become really good friends, all of them. They were like our older brothers, and now we have to be that to the incoming 19 of mixed Bulgar/Poles next week. I'm sending home pictures of our Zone, you can tell by flag who's who ( our district has the Croatian, Serbian, and Slovene flags, though)

Also, cool story, the only 2 Slovak sisters are legit. One's from Whales and the other is from France. They each speak like 5 languages, and Elder Sheridan and I ate lunch with them one day, and it was awesome! We tried describing to the French sister (she's pretty good at English, but struggles sometimes) what kite surfing was (not sure how that came up) and it was fun with the language barriers trying to describe it, (Sister Jones-Whelsch, would translate a lot to Sister Belibi Minja-French). They're awesome, and now they insist we are their best American friends. Sending pictures of them too.

Now to the nitty gritty. This week we had an awesome devotional on Tuesday, as usual. The main thing learned there was the we are God's investigators and He is our missionary. The commandments He gives to us are as the commitments we give to our investigators, and as we strive to keep them, He blesses us with growth and more commandments to grow. So how could we expect our investigators to keep and follow commitments if we can't follow ours from the Lord? It was awesome. 

Then I had a very difficult Wednesday. Not because it was Valentine's Day or anything, I'm a man. But I just struggled. The language is getting harder, but the more I get accustomed to speaking it, the more I realize how much I stink at teaching. Like, I don't envy the Enlgish speaking elders anymore--they have it hard from day 1 because teaching is difficult and new. We get a good 3-4 weeks of struggling with language and getting comfortable here in the yard before that burden gets heaped on top too. Really, Wednesday was so hard. That evening, I didn't eat dinner because A) it looked nasty, weird coming from me cause I'll eat anything, and B) because I was upset and frustrated. During companionship study, Elder Sheridan suggested we fast the next day. I agreed, and then he says "Let's start right now thru dinner tomorrow." Well that was all fine and dandy, but I hadn't eaten since an early lunch! But he was right. We discussed what to fast for, and before he prayed I asked if we could include a fast for me with personal struggles. He said yes, and so we began. It was not hard that night or the next morning--I have fasted before. I had been reading much in my personal study lately about how subjecting your body to your Spirit is essential, and more than starvation. We studied harder that day, delved into the scriptures, made absolute use of our time studying language and all that jazz. But then, I'm not sure how, but we had wiped ourselves out mentally and spiritually, and our body felt the toll. I feel as though the adversary found occasion against us then, because I felt my strength leave me. I literally was trembling, my limbs were in so much pain! It was absolutely foreign and strange and unexpected and it stunk! And there was a pile of food right there.....we only had 3 hours left! It was so hard. I began rationalizing. "Surely we have given our all, we have put more into today than any other day! 3 hours won't matter!" I was then reminded of a devotional, in a part about waking up on time, "one minute doesn't really matter. But obedience does matter." And Elder Sheridan firmly said we would not eat. We could make it 3 hours more. So I got on my knees and prayed "Heavenly Father, I cannot do this. I can hardly focus hard enough to say this prayer. If I am to not waste thy time for studying these next and final 3 hours, I need Thy strength. Otherwise, I must close my fast, and thus make good use of Thy time." Something to that effect. Instantly, my limbs only hurt from the CrossFit from the night before (yeah, turns out Elder Payne is even MORE of a stud than before. We do CrossFit every night.) and the hunger pains were subdued. Not gone, but subdued. And we made it to dinner! 

I was reminded of a time when I was mowing the lawn, probably 10-11 years old, and in my desperation to be finished to go play or something, I skipped a row. A tiny, half-sized row. The tree partially covered it too, I rationalized. Surely it wouldn't make a difference, and I would cut the whole lawn next week. Then Dad came out to check, and asked me if I got everything? He emphasized everything, and I knew I'd been found out. Shamefully and after much protest, I cut it again. That lesson compounded, and I learned to finish a job all the way. I learned to enjoy it! Mowing the lawn became precious time to spend with my brothers, a healthy competition for Chip and I to see who could cut better and fastest, or whatever else we could come up with. It became a smiling opportunity to pretend to start the mower for Mom when she asked and then take it from her and cut it quickly. The job became a part of me as I learned to be perfectly obedient to it. It shaped me. And thus we cannot follow the commandments and rules simply because they are there. Even the smallest, stupidest ones, must be followed because they ARE us. They form who we are and the shape who we will be, based on our obedience to them. Tons more stories and cool ish, but I can't remember them all and I have no time! Guess this is all the Lord wants you to hear!

I love and miss you all so much and you are always in my prayers. And I gain strength from you. Stay strong on your end, and we'll do our part on ours. 

Love,
Elder Hixon

P.S. if anybody has earplugs or a snoring mask thing, that'd be great. Because the three of us have nearly killed Elder Barber these long nights. AND I ran into a guy wearing a Campo Verde softball jacket, and I was confused because he was a guy. Then I was more confused because the back said "-------." Turns out I ran into --------mystery boyfriend from California! He exists!! 

P.P.S. I have been DYING waiting for news on Oakley each day. So get that priority mail update when she's born stat, please :)